I wrote most of the material for this blog in 2018, when I was at a difficult part of my life. I was trying to figure out how emotional maturity works, and how relationships work.

The material I produced is very intellectual and analytical, because that’s the kind of person I am. But the downside of that is that it’s all theory — it sounds good on paper, but does it actually work in practice? Is this what emotional maturity is really all about, or did I get it wrong? I wasn’t really certain at the time.

In 2021, I met an amazing person who shared my ideas about how to build a great relationship: open, honest communication, and respect for the feelings of both partners. Recognizing that feelings have important information, but you have to think about them. Adopting the attitude that no feeling is wrong, not even anger, and listening to every feeling with compassion and understanding.

It seemed a little scary to actually put these ideas into practice, but we did, from the very first day of our relationship. Now, two years later, I can say with confidence that they work. This really is a recipe for a better life.

The kind of intimacy that comes from this, what it feels like to be so close to someone and to feel so attuned, it’s hard to put it into words. It just feels… so right. Like this was the way life was meant to be lived.

Songs about love used to seem silly to me, but a lot of them actually make sense now. I get how someone could feel that way. It turns out that love is real, more than I ever knew. And now that I know what it feels like, I don’t want to live my life any other way.

I want to say thank you. To Courtney, my love, for bringing so much of your love, wisdom, and kindness into my life. I am so grateful to you for coming with me on this journey, and so happy that we made it all this way together.

Thank you for everything.